My New Normal - 11 weeks 2 days

Sleeping has taken priority over writing in my life now, not that I don't get enough sleep (Baby girl now sleeps anywhere from 7-9 hour stretches) but I feel that the quality of sleep has declined. Scarlett is still sleeping in my room next to me in her car seat. Yes, car seat. Since 5 weeks Scarlett has been battling reflux. Any time she lays down flat she spits up. If she sits up too upright...projectile vomiting. Her optimal angle is roughly 45 degrees, and that's where her car seat comes in. She has been sleeping in it now, as a burrito, for 6 weeks now. And although she sleeps well now, I still find myself waking up anytime she changes postion, sighs in her sleep or her newest thing, talking while in REM. I wake up sporadically to place a hand on her chest to feel it steadily rise and fall. I even sleep with the closet light on, like I did as a kid, to see her anytime my eyes are open. I'm a tired momma.

I'm loving life as a mother. Being Scarlett's mom has been the biggest blessing in my entire life. I love everything that comes with this awesome responsibility, blow out diapers, stinky cheese neck, tiny dagger finger nails, big gummy smiles with clenched fists, burrito wiggles, bath time splashes, boogies, just everything. I know that every parent thinks that they have the most beautiful, most wonderful child...I am no exception, I think that she is the best ever. Her little personality is blossoming. She is stubborn, feisty and loving. She's a boob girl, hates bottles, and protests that you're denying her her boobies. She is always smiling, those big gummy smiles, eyes pinched shut and fists in a ball. Even after a first round of shots, she smiled at the nurse. She's a late nighter, late sleeper and is happiest when she wakes up. She screeches with joy when she gets changed in the morning. She babbles back to Matt and I. She rarely cries or fusses, that is just how happy she is. She is calm and tolerant as Matt and I fumble through being new parents, she just watches us with her big steel blue eyes, an amused smile on her face. Bath time is her favorite, she splashes with her crazy legs, purposely getting Matt extra wet when he washes her, I still think it's payback from all the poking and prodding he did when she was in my belly. She's can shove her whole fist in her mouth, proudly might I add. Her newest past time is to spit her sucky out, smile, wait for you to put it back in and do it all over again. She's a daddy's girl through and through. The minute she sees Matt she lights up. He is hers. And he knows that. She nuzzles him and whimsically falls asleep while he whispers in her ear. She watches him intensely when he plays her guitar while smiling each time he stops to look back at her. I love that she loves him, and love that he loves her so much.

I love my new normal. My days are surrounded by her, making her happy, helping her grow and flourish. We play, she nurses, she sleeps, we go out, see friends and go new places. I look forward to bed time the most when it is just her and I, snuggled in the dark, listening to classical music while we rock. It's hard for me to imagine that she has only been her for 11 weeks, it feels like she has always been intertwined in my life, I am so excited that I get to spend the rest of mine helping her grow up to be the amazing person I know she is already destined to be.